Comments on Evolution

559. I just want to roll another another joint, then we can listen to Jimi Hendrix.


558. Pitched the Ballcuzzi to the CEO of my company at Friday's staff party when I was drunk.


557. I witnessed a child taking a dump near the summit of lions head today and his grandfather pulling up a wad of grass with which to wipe his arse. It was so stinky.


556. I have just looked at so many dogs in uniforms with varying amounts of medals


555. My supervisor here is basically winnie the pooh the way he eats honey straight out the jar.


554. Oh dude if you want to know Pokémon let’s grab a drink


553. I was looking at you this morning and thinking, “There is so much that can go wrong with this brain.”


552. Omg thank you for acknowledging my budgie video


551. I'll just eat Oreos and watch myself dance when I get home.


550. If this was Russia, we’d be squatting.


549. I dance whenever I get a free moment just to taunt people.


548. Dude, I’ve always had chutzpah to put music on.


547. I’ve heard like 8 different v unenthusiastic ‘it’s your boy’s today


546. Ok so let me know when you want to go fabric shopping for pizza suit.


545. Please always sleep at our feet.


544. They snuck off and smoked weed to watch Lonely Island because that's how fucking kak it is.


543. Please don't refer to my super conservative Christian aunt as "foamy".


542. Do you ever think of the concept of teleportation and how you're essentially killed and reassembled on the other side as a new person thinking theyre living a continuation of life? / And then apply that thought to the continuum of every moment of existence?


541. And when the sun goes down, we can smoke a bit more and watch Seinfeld.


540. We are drunk and a little high and your stories are killing us


539. - How many more times can I say “big dick energy” this episode? - Three more times.


538. This guy I just picked up is possibly the most German card in Vampire ever.


537. You can send long messages forever I will always read them


536. Imagine you’re a time traveler, but you’re from 2017.


535. I replied to your email man. Let me know if u want some thermodynamics lessons.


534. Everything I am standing on is lava


533. I'm sorry Mart but I won't be able to ever stop saying "I always take care of my paesanos" to you


532. Sent email to gallery! / Sorry early message just remembered that you are unemployed


531. Is it jasmine season? I’ve smelled jasmine and farts all day.


530. Why are you searching for Maleven on Gumtree?


529. Mart, did you see the London Eye?


528. I feel like I’ve spent a large portion of my adult life waiting for people to stop talking to other people.


527. - Can I read you a Dagga Groin limerick? - Yes please.


526. Bro if u had stuck around I would've let u taste the best veggie wors of ur life. But u sleepin


525. I'm going to play thrash metal unless you stop me.


524. Ah, I had the mouse the wrong way around. That explains why it was so hard to use.


523. - If a cleric successfully casts Detect Lie on someone, do they literally see a vision of the liar's pants on fire? - Yes.


522. - Don't you want to be part of the Cenation? - No, the Roman Empire is better.


521. I like how you curtseyed and I bowed.


520. Martin, come here. I can show you my pokemon.


519. I did not realise that being stoned around this bunk bed was going to be a completely different experience.


518. Just downloaded a theme hospital sound board app. Now have all the samples / Including poops and pukes / I feel like Felix Laband / It's like vapour wave, I can't wait to play it for you with samples mixed over


517. "Gnomelock Holmes" is a better name.


516. How many Bob Marley songs can we get for R100?


515. I was literally about to Whatsapp you ten minutes ago. I wanted to talk to you about bucatini, but we can chat now.


514. Third episode you enter an alternative universe where the number of minutes in an hour are 10 and not 60. You come home at 6:9. Your house mate is 420ing. Let me explain. In this universe the atoms behave differently and organisms can move through each other and are not subject to the limitations of a physical body. There are also four sexes and all are required for procreation. So you do the math.


513. I wouldn't want to toke from anything that my balls have been soaking in for half an hour.


512. Miss spelled Dagga Groin on my story / No link / Only 1 person saw it / My old creative director


511. Why are you always taking these horrible photos of me? At least my nose is straight now.


510. Married and now my ex boyfriend is appearing in insta spon con with debts on his bald head


509. We need to draw money for pizza and weed. I'm messaging weed; you phone pizza.


508. Bye Marty. You made all my stories.


507. - Do you want to hear I'll Make Love to You? - Always.


506. 69% battery / moves:69 / time 4:19 / Getting closer...


505. But Martin, have you heard what Bruce said in an interview: "Blues in the verse, gospel in the chorus"? We can discuss.


504. My first attempt at screengrabbing a 69 - 4:20 score on freecell / If you look top right you can see 'moves: 69' and in the top center it has '4:23' as the time / Took too long to grab on Hua wei


503. nancy_cartwright started following you.


502. I think if someone invited me to console them about their dead dog, they wouldn't invite me to Bombay Bicycle Club.


501. - Who's Seth? - Cain and Abel's younger brother. - Fuck off, Adam and Eve didn't have a third son!


500. I always said, either to you or about you, that you have a way of making all your interactions and everything you do in your life filled with great meaning and purpose that's completely unique.


499. My favorite line is definitely “kgb was stalking me”


498. It's hard to appreciate new things if you don't have the proper outfit to wear.


497. HOW DO YOU HAVE ALL THESE SHIRTS BUT ALWAYS END UP BEING LIKE DEXTER


496. It's so great being sentient.


495. All that spaniel needed was a good wank.


494. - What tribe is Stevie from? The farkakte one? - Yes Mart, the farkakte tribe. Your Yiddish is improving.


493. He'd complain about the floors of the wank booths being covered in tissues, but it never stopped him from having a tonk in them.


492. - Cain and Abel weren't Jews? Are you kidding me? - No, the first Jew was Abraham.


491. I have a top score of 1064 / 5 playing as Sri Lanka. Marvin Attapattu is overpowered


490. And all I've been thinking over the past two weeks, was that I need to do a Dagga Groin drawing.


489. to unwind before bed last night i was googling the names of the poets we're reading poems of with the keyword "racist"


488. Menu please ? / The menu, Please ! my Tasties / Would like to place 1 x order for Goodies


487. I feel like the video editor was fucking around and just triple stacked the same ciao debonairs style and no one noticed.


486. This movie is shocking. I’m just waiting for Iggy


485. Martin, if you ever go on a reality TV show, please describe yourself as a 33 year old DJ.


484. What I wana see is a pic of you w kev the best


483. Yes its an amazing footstool


482. I remember going onto an internet chat forum once omg / This is dark / A long long time ago / It was possibly, like: mybroadband food ideas / And it was just a bunch of extremely nerdy student dudes discussing digs food ideas. I remember the one Oke suggested a recipe for pasta with a can of tuna it in and then a can of mushroom soup as the sauce, and at the end you crush and sprinkle crinkle cut chips over the whole affair - I swear to G


481. Has anyone ever eaten some Fattis & Monis with the Spur pink sauce on it


480. RG was put on this earth for the sole purpose of bringing DB into being on our screens, thank you.


479. What?! You didn't know Charlie Chaplin was a Jew?! He wasn't just a Jew, he was a Jew.


478. - I can't believe the ICC okayed klusener wearing 69 - It was a different time


477. "Indian coach standing like a double handled tea pot" / I assume his hands were on his hips


476. He (Prokofiev) was hated in high school because he kept a tally of everyone's failures.


475. Get ready with the sarcastic applause for when that fielder gets the ball again.


474. Martin, that chocolate is nasty.


473. Move over buddy, we're playing Bob Marley.


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      • 559. I just want to roll another another joint, th...
      • 558. Pitched the Ballcuzzi to the CEO of my compan...
      • 557. I witnessed a child taking a dump near the su...
    • ►  November (2)
      • 556. I have just looked at so many dogs in uniform...
      • 555. My supervisor here is basically winnie the po...
    • ►  October (3)
      • 554. Oh dude if you want to know Pokémon let’s gra...
      • 553. I was looking at you this morning and thinkin...
      • 552. Omg thank you for acknowledging my budgie video
    • ►  September (3)
      • 551. I'll just eat Oreos and watch myself dance wh...
      • 550. If this was Russia, we’d be squatting.
      • 549. I dance whenever I get a free moment just to ...
    • ►  August (4)
      • 548. Dude, I’ve always had chutzpah to put music on.
      • 547. I’ve heard like 8 different v unenthusiastic ...
      • 546. Ok so let me know when you want to go fabric ...
      • 545. Please always sleep at our feet.
    • ►  July (8)
      • 544. They snuck off and smoked weed to watch Lonel...
      • 543. Please don't refer to my super conservative C...
      • 542. Do you ever think of the concept of teleporta...
      • 541. And when the sun goes down, we can smoke a bi...
      • 540. We are drunk and a little high and your stori...
      • 539. - How many more times can I say “big dick ene...
      • 538. This guy I just picked up is possibly the mos...
      • 537. You can send long messages forever I will alw...
    • ►  June (6)
      • 536. Imagine you’re a time traveler, but you’re fr...
      • 535. I replied to your email man. Let me know if u...
      • 534. Everything I am standing on is lava
      • 533. I'm sorry Mart but I won't be able to ever st...
      • 532. Sent email to gallery! / Sorry early message ...
      • 531. Is it jasmine season? I’ve smelled jasmine an...
    • ►  May (6)
      • 530. Why are you searching for Maleven on Gumtree?
      • 529. Mart, did you see the London Eye?
      • 528. I feel like I’ve spent a large portion of my ...
      • 527. - Can I read you a Dagga Groin limerick? - Ye...
      • 526. Bro if u had stuck around I would've let u ta...
      • 525. I'm going to play thrash metal unless you sto...
    • ►  April (9)
      • 524. Ah, I had the mouse the wrong way around. Tha...
      • 523. - If a cleric successfully casts Detect Lie o...
      • 522. - Don't you want to be part of the Cenation? ...
      • 521. I like how you curtseyed and I bowed.
      • 520. Martin, come here. I can show you my pokemon.
      • 519. I did not realise that being stoned around th...
      • 518. Just downloaded a theme hospital sound board ...
      • 517. "Gnomelock Holmes" is a better name.
      • 516. How many Bob Marley songs can we get for R100?
    • ►  March (17)
      • 515. I was literally about to Whatsapp you ten min...
      • 514. Third episode you enter an alternative univer...
      • 513. I wouldn't want to toke from anything that my...
      • 512. Miss spelled Dagga Groin on my story / No lin...
      • 511. Why are you always taking these horrible phot...
      • 510. Married and now my ex boyfriend is appearing ...
      • 509. We need to draw money for pizza and weed. I'm...
      • 508. Bye Marty. You made all my stories.
      • 507. - Do you want to hear I'll Make Love to You? ...
      • 506. 69% battery / moves:69 / time 4:19 / Getting ...
      • 505. But Martin, have you heard what Bruce said in...
      • 504. My first attempt at screengrabbing a 69 - 4:2...
      • 503. nancy_cartwright started following you.
      • 502. I think if someone invited me to console them...
      • 501. - Who's Seth? - Cain and Abel's younger broth...
      • 500. I always said, either to you or about you, th...
      • 499. My favorite line is definitely “kgb was stalk...
    • ►  February (18)
      • 498. It's hard to appreciate new things if you don...
      • 497. HOW DO YOU HAVE ALL THESE SHIRTS BUT ALWAYS E...
      • 496. It's so great being sentient.
      • 495. All that spaniel needed was a good wank.
      • 494. - What tribe is Stevie from? The farkakte one...
      • 493. He'd complain about the floors of the wank bo...
      • 492. - Cain and Abel weren't Jews? Are you kidding...
      • 491. I have a top score of 1064 / 5 playing as Sri...
      • 490. And all I've been thinking over the past two ...
      • 489. to unwind before bed last night i was googlin...
      • 488. Menu please ? / The menu, Please ! my Tasties...
      • 487. I feel like the video editor was fucking arou...
      • 486. This movie is shocking. I’m just waiting for ...
      • 485. Martin, if you ever go on a reality TV show, ...
      • 484. What I wana see is a pic of you w kev the best
      • 483. Yes its an amazing footstool
      • 482. I remember going onto an internet chat forum ...
      • 481. Has anyone ever eaten some Fattis & Monis wit...
    • ►  January (8)
      • 480. RG was put on this earth for the sole purpose...
      • 479. What?! You didn't know Charlie Chaplin was a ...
      • 478. - I can't believe the ICC okayed klusener wea...
      • 477. "Indian coach standing like a double handled ...
      • 476. He (Prokofiev) was hated in high school becau...
      • 475. Get ready with the sarcastic applause for whe...
      • 474. Martin, that chocolate is nasty.
      • 473. Move over buddy, we're playing Bob Marley.
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