472. I have a good story from today for you involving a dog

471. Received so many wishes this year / Does no one know I'm a Jew?

470. I was reading in the economist that China is ramping up efforts to improve its toilet situation, given that tourism is on the rise. Apparently the government circulated a memo with guidelines on what constitutes a ‘good’ toilet versus a ‘bad’ toilet, and one of the stipulations was that all toilets must have no more than two flies at any given time.

469. - Did Woolworths design these mince pie brownies for stoners? - Yes. Absolutely.

468. Did you use my housekeeping instructions as a mull blad

467. It feels like the synapses in my brain are all dabbing

466. ‘A long long time ago in a galaxy far away Star Wars Everyone is now dead, forget about everything before. Female protagonist and trainer now are what you will watch.’

465. Please learn how to screengrab

464. the Green Lanterns detachable pipe can also break on the fall of the Checkers fresh produce isle and get replaced

463. The green lantern is Dagga Groin’s most trusted bong. It lights up like a lantern when danger is near

462. We woke up, got high, then walked for three hours.

461. I can't believe this is the same night we braaied those marshmallows.

460. Joh, science is amazing. Faaak. Science.

459. The combination of that wedding, cheese and your life gave me the most wonderful and epic of dreams.

458. Let's go throw stones at the drone.

457. Do you think someone's monitoring how much we're eating?

456. Speedo, hat, sun cream, sharp knife, mosquito stuff, butter, garlic, parsley, ganja, matches